I'm sitting alone with my thoughts in the dark basement. The shop sign is casting a glow. Snow is gently falling outside. Even though I'm not a fan of snow its soft fall is making my heart feel so peaceful this morning.
My life has changed so much in the last couple of years. It's went from stay at home mom with gym dates and dinner on the table nightly, to full time business owner with helpers here almost every day. Writing a blog has become a memory. I've forgotten how to express myself here. Time is precious. The cursor blinks...what comes next?
I'll just start with the happenings around here lately. My Big Chick turned 16 recently!! For those of you that have been following along forever here's a pic of the family when I first started writing out my thoughts. Can you believe it! We were living in Minnesota. My days were so much different. I marvel at how life can change. How fast it all goes!
My oldest is learning to drive. She's got around 12 hours behind the wheel so far and it's starting to get a little less terrifying. At first I really thought I might need medicated! Seriously all of us in one giant hunk of metal, flying down the road with someone who doesn't know the difference between the gas and brake pedals! She's doing much better now. I've stopped clenching my teeth and I can actually breathe when she's driving. Progress. Sidenote... I've become so accustom to using my smart phone's emoji's I'm finding it almost impossible to type this out. How do I express myself fully without the little monkey covering his eyes? Without the little face laughing to the point of tears. Seriously this is challenging;) Can you feel my emotion without the little faces? Urgggghhh!
Back to my girl and her birthday. Sixteen is major. It's the age we've set for dating, driving, working...spreading her wings and flying. Insert heart palpitations here. And what amazes me time and again; the things we never felt ready to let her do, once the time comes for her to do them, miraculously God shows up and we have the grace for it. It's truly miraculous. He helps us let go. His timing is perfect. Trust Him!
So we have been walking through so much stuff with her. Parenting a teenager is no joke. It brings up all the same crap we had to deal with in high school. Insecurities. Feeling alone. Not knowing what you want to do with your life. Feeling scared you're gonna miss your calling. I'm reminded daily of how important our roles as parents is. How much they need us. For instance on my sixteenth birthday my boyfriend at the time called me and told me he had just taken an entire bottle of pills and then hung up the phone. Lovely hunh?!!!:/ Being able to share horror stories with your kids about your past struggles and hard times makes them feel less freaked out about their own. It gets better...life. All those crazy past experiences shape us and make us stronger.
For you young mommas out there that worry about your babies not needing you once they get a little more independent...think again! It's a whole new ballgame and your unique story; your relationship with the Lord; your partnership with your spouse will become more important than ever. We have such a big part in calming their fears, in helping them feel normal and guiding their footsteps in hopefully the right direction. It has a way of bonding you SO close, and keeping you on your knees with your heavenly Daddy as well. Oh the beautiful circle of life:) Thank you Lord for the privilege of parenthood and for being blessed with the sweetest girls ever. My cup truly runneth over.
Be a blessing.