Friday, November 18, 2011


I think a lot about fear.  Maybe because lately I'm faced with it on a day to day basis.  It occured to me as I was driving the other day that I've crossed a milestone with living here.  When we first got here every time I got in the car to drive somewhere I was terrified.  The roads are extremely narrow with no shoulders.  They curve and dip and leave your stomach in knots.  I would even get a little car sick.  Every time a person would pass me I would raise up my shoulders, squint my eyes and let out a little EEEEEK!  Because it looked like they were going to hit me for sure.

It dawned on me as I was whizzing through the trees on my very own roller coaster/race track home the other day, that I'm passed that particular fear.  YIPPEEE!!!!  For the most part I don't shriek anymore.  My heart doesn't race every time I pull out onto that road, and the only thing I can think of that got me over that fear was that I HAD NO CHOICE, but to do it  There is no other route.  No other option.  Sometimes you just have to do it afraidUh and pleading with God to help me might have had a little part in it too;)

Fast forward to last night where my friend Maureen dragged me into another adventure.  Well she didn't really have to drag me I was jumping at the bit to go;)  She has an amazing group of friends and we've set up a craft group called f.e.a.t. (friends exploring art together).  Once a month we are going to meet and share a fun craft/skill with each other.  Isn't that like the best idea ever!!!

Last night was our first meeting and it was appropriately called masks and margaritas:)  You take stripes of plaster gauze, wet them and apply them all over your very Vaselined face...making a really cool mask.  It sets up pretty fast and after it's hardened you can paint and decorate it.  That's our next meeting.

Maureen.  Isn't she beautiful??  Love the mummified look she had going on!  Creepy:)

Taking the mask off was a bit tricky.  You had to pull it really slow, because it suctions to your face a little bit and it stings slightly.  I'm thinking we all just got a great spa exfoliation treatment for free;)


Okay so my turn came around.  Never thought I'd show myself in a shower cap and Vaseline on here...but there's always a first time for everything;)

About halfway in something kind of snapped to attention in me and I hit a panic wall.  It was like oh yeah I'm supposed to be afraid...cue heart racing NOW.  I'm a little claustrophobic.  I don't like airplanes or tight spaces...forget about going under water, but I thought I might be able to do this.   Unfortunately the fear just reared up it's ugly head. 

I wanted more than anything to just rip that thing OFF MY FACE!!!!!  Get it OFF.  I got up.  Took some deep breaths.  Kept reminding myself that I could breath and had my Nan finish me.  That's the thing with fear.  Most of the time it's irrational.  Will that spider hurt you?  Will talking in front of people be the worst thing that could happen?  Actually that's another biggie for me.  That's why I hide behind a computer;) 

Not sure if Nan was trying to distract me or what but pretty soon she started telling a story that made me want to laugh so hard, but I couldn't.  I would retell it, but it's completely inappropriate for my sweet little blog here. 

The reward for not ripping of the mask is that I get a cool visual of overcoming that panic attack.  I did something afraid.  Oh yeah and I moved to Virginia.  I drive on that death trap of a road everyday.  I make stuff.  I write stuff, and present it to you.  And day in and day out I'm reminded that it's alright to go for your dreams.  It's alright to be afraid.  It's just a reminder that you are living and breathing and human after all.  Just don't let it stop you. 

Have a blessed weekend.

242.  thank God it's FRIDAY
243.  meeting new creative women
244.  overcoming fear
245.  finding someone to teach me Lightroom
246.  my new "where women create" magazine...inspiration overload


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  1. Hi sweet crazy friend,

    Self awareness is a gift...and boy do you have it! It allows you to overcome or embrace it. It helps you grow and you are doing exactly that! I love that last picture of you - joy!

  2. you look absolutely radiant in that last picture. so so beautiful! what a cool idea, i can't wait to see what you end up with!

    btw, two of my very favorite, most special people in the whole world (they were like my parents) live in virginia. and, if my husband came home today and said we could go there, i would happily pack up my house and move. in a heartbeat. i know this move has been hard on you, but there are some of us who are just insanely jealous of where you are!! enjoy it becky!

  3. Becky, I needed this post today. Thank you for sharing it. By the way, you looked so beautiful after conquering your fear! Go you!

  4. the past two days have been nothing but "doing it afraid" just day in and day out and it's only been two days!

    thank you for this, thank you for reminding me of the beauty that will come if I just trust my Father.

    Can't wait to see the painted faces!! :o)

  5. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I needed this post. I had a panic attack at work yesterday and have been dealing with the fear of everything lately. You freed me a bit today. :-)

  6. When I started reading about "fear" I thought it really didn't apply to me. I haven't struggled with fear in my life but when you mentioned being claustrophobic, I could relate. I had a root canal this year and the dentist put something called a dental dam in my mouth. I panicked. I ended up using gas and was okay but have had two other "claustrophobic" experiences this year too. So, I guess I do have an irrational fear. Heights get me too. ;) Glad you were able to get past yours though. The mask is cool. :) Oh and if you think you roads are bad, ha ha you should drive where I live (mountains of Southwest Virginia.) ;) =D

  7. I'm not sure I could do the mask thing. At first, I thought you were at a spa. Have a wonderful weekend. :)

  8. I heard once that if you start thanking God for things, your panic attack will become less or go away. I've done this and "when" I've done it, it has worked.
    I don't know...just telling you what I've heard...and done, but do I trust it(Him) to work every time? No. But I should, right?

  9. LOVE your post...I need to get myself out there in so many ways and you're inspiring me! Thanks Becky!

  10. Looks like FUN!! Glad you have new friends to do stuff like that with :)

    Happy Friday!


  11. BRAVO, Becky...for taking chances and for staring fear right in the eyes! Go get 'em, girl!

  12. This is really good. You're so good at making me feel better about life and dreams and HOPE. You reflect Christ and I love ya for it.

    Ps. Your post mask face is gorgeous! I might need to have my own mask day for exfoliating purposes. My face could use some lovin!

  13. I totally forgot to tell you about a dream I had! It went like this: The kids and I were randomly in Virginia and happened to drive by your house (I knew it was yours bc you had a Farmgirl Paints sticker on your car- ha!). We went in and took pictures (obviously!) and then we had to leave to get home Cherleston for snack time. How fun and random!

  14. It should say: to Charleston.

    Argh! Auto correct!

  15. i can't get over how every single one of your posts like this one speak straight to my soul, even though our current life situations are so very different from each others.

  16. Fear...claustraphobia and panic attacks...I can relate to all those things too! what a great post. Off to ponder your words...


  17. You are very, very brave Becky.
    You are amazing.

  18. BRAVO!!! That is such an amazing post. We all have something we fear and need to face. I took on a big challenge this past week and started donating plasma. (there's a post waiting to happen about this) Happy Friday!

  19. Girl you were so much braver than I was. I would have totally freaked. Glad I got to come and hangout though and laugh a whole bunch :-) Can't wait for next time. It was great getting to know you better. Looking forward to many many more fun nights in the very near future!

  20. Great post and love how you illustrated fear through the masks.

    I would have a "hibby jibby" fit having my face covered like that but I sure do like the idea of it. Please show us yours painted when you finish it.

    Have a great weekend!

  21. Ohhh Becky you are so cute! I love to hear that you have a group of friends and are doing a fun night once a month!! It is wonderful to see your journey as you make you new home your new life ~

    hugs and prayers!!

  22. i TOTALLY get you with the road deal...oh my goodness!!!! NOT like where i come from at all. and holy WOW you are gorgous getting all masked. :)

  23. Okay, I'm not just saying this, but you ARE beautiful in a shower cap and Vaseline! You have gorgeous natural features that stand out all on their own. No mask needed.

    And, YIKES! I have the same fear of speaking in front of people....sometimes even when it's a small group of people I KNOW! And I'm a teacher for goodness sake! When you said you "hide behind a computer" I was nodding my head in too. Darn fear.

    I just have to remind myself He's got my back....and my front....and my everywhere!


  24. Very cool idea forming an artsy group. I would love that. I need to mix things up a bit, so this feels rather inspiring. Now, the mask thing though, I know I would be like you, totally clastrophobic.

  25. I'm so impressed....God is stretching you in're making friends and doing fun things.

    And, one last thing....were the margaritas good? I haven't had a margarita in about 6 months...thinking one with a big plate of mexican food sounds like something I should take in real soon. :)

  26. all I can say is AMEN sista!
    The things you find to do amaze me..crazy good
    keep pushing the boundary girl. You got it!
    and that first picture? priceless. So good and it made me smile. Oh the beauty of vulnerability on a weekend:)
    big hugs

  27. Bravo to you my friend for overcoming your fear and look at the cool results! Cannot wait to see it all painted up ~ I know it will be fabulous. xo

  28. that group sounds so fun!
    becky, i admire you. :)

  29. great post. great message. i can't wait to see the finished project.

  30. So inspiring Becky, I love the way you write :) X

  31. how do you manage to look so GORGEOUS after having just peeled that pile of goo off of your face? :)

  32. Good for you, Becky! This post really touched me because I tend to let my fears get the better of me...too often:)

  33. perfect! love this post!! :)
    keep being brave, girlie. (andyes, you are gorgeous, even covered in plaster and vaseline!) :)

  34. Thanks for sharing your heart. I can usually relate quite well. And thanks for leaving a comment on my wittle bittie unknown blog a while back, lol, I felt like a celebrity had visited me. :)


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