Sunday, August 1, 2010

journey girl

I really don't like doing murals.  There is an insecure process that I go through every time.  First the agony of oh no my work is going to be on someone's wall and they will have it in their face BIG...every day.  Then I have the "I don't have a clue what in the world I'm doing" stage.  Why in the world did I act like I did??  Then the dread of actually starting the project, and finally in the middle...when it looks it's worst...I want to run away.  I actually want to just cry and run. 

I've figured it out though.  I'm not a journey girl.  That's horrible to say because that's where we are most of the time.  I really don't like the messy in between parts.  I like it when the big picture is in focus and all the edges are smoothed out and I can actually tell it's going to be alright. 

Sorry for the blurry picture.  This is where my day was spent...on this ledge.  Praying pleading with God that it would look okay in the end.  That I wouldn't fall off and kill myself.

My neighbor Tammy wanted a Scandinavian fishing village.  She gave me lots of brochures...with perfect beautiful pictures of Sweden and Copenhagen.  I was freaking out a little inside thinking ummmm that's a little outside my comfort zone. 

My style is whimsy...childlike.  Not perfect or realistic.  I kept stressing that...trying to manage expectations.

Turns out in the end I liked it.  She liked it.  All was well...whew!!!!

Why do I freak?  How do I learn to trust God??   In the end I was covered in paint.  My back was killing me and I was totally exhausted....probably from all the fretting;)  But once again the result was good.  Maybe someday I'll actually learn to enjoy the journey...nah! 

Have a blessed day.

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